Tensions

–> I am beginning to name my knots. Let one in my neck be Wanting from every time I clenched my jaw after breathing in her scent. Let the tightness in my shoulder be Disappointment who is also called Shame a product of still wanting him to touch me even though we both know he shouldn’t and being caught between recoiling and not. Finally, the chronic ache in my back will be Distance from consistently loving people that are too far away. In the same way one muscle contracts as the other relaxes these pains are interconnected and I know…

Death Throes

Morbid fascination kills me again and again. These are the death throes Of our potential. This is the not the martyrdom I try to tell myself it is. It is assisted suicide. Nor is it the first time- Reincarnation ad nauseam, Same me, different yous- Till nirvana: A state I cannot reach. It sickens me, The way I crave Your attentions. Like Tantalus I thirst And am never satisfied. You bloom perpetual While I fade like echoes. Jeweled fruit that fall From your lips Into my ears Sweet fruit, biting aftertaste, Like soured wine to the dying man, Leaves me…