Dec 22, 2014 There was a fullness to our love like that mango just within your reach unblemished and warm falling straight into your palm eaten under the shade of the tree juice dripping down your elbow temporary in its bliss, but perfect in that moment.
Tensions
–> I am beginning to name my knots. Let one in my neck be Wanting from every time I clenched my jaw after breathing in her scent. Let the tightness in my shoulder be Disappointment who is also called Shame a product of still wanting him to touch me even though we both know he shouldn’t and being caught between recoiling and not. Finally, the chronic ache in my back will be Distance from consistently loving people that are too far away. In the same way one muscle contracts as the other relaxes these pains are interconnected and I know…
Dear Beloved
An open letter to everyone I’ve ever convinced myself I loved. I. I am still sorry. I fear that you were just the first in a long line of men I will be all too willing to bury my loneliness in. II. Now that I’ve figured that you wronged me, I am not ready to forgive. III. I loved you more than you knew, but you were still right: it was not enough. IV. I have learned what the infinite tastes like but I still haven’t learned that people can’t be fixed because they aren’t broken, or that I deserve…
Coming Out
I read that we never get to stop coming out. Well I came out to myself the other day, Stepped out of my glass closet for a moment, Well, not so much a class closet than one of those Cabinets old people use to store their china I am transparent, the way I hoard your gifts, Your presents, your presence. I never tell the ones who need to hear it the most. Instead I let it rest on my lips the way I wish yours would And flitter round my tongue the way I want yours to, But I can’t….
An Education
I want to learn the language your body speaks, Whispered by your hips as you move, Decode the ciphers between your sighs. I have learned the angle of your slouch, The spread of your fingers And the coil of your curls. There is a science to you I have not yet learned. I have learned the contours of your face The locations of your moles The longitude and latitude of your dimples The length and breadth of your smile Better than I ever learned geography. Maybe I’d map those contours of your face (Which I’ve already committed to memory) but…