I
am beginning to name my knots.
Let
one in my neck be Wanting
from
every time I clenched my jaw after breathing in her scent.
Let
the tightness in my shoulder be Disappointment who is also called Shame
a
product of still wanting him to touch me
even
though we both know he shouldn't
and
being caught between recoiling and not.
Finally,
the chronic ache in my back will be Distance
from
consistently loving people that are too far away.
In
the same way one muscle contracts as the other relaxes
these
pains are interconnected
and
I know that all these names mean the same thing:
I
hold on for far too long and I need to learn to let go.